So this older guy goes to the doctor asking for a prescription for Viagra. The guy asks for a large dose of the strongest variety. The doctor asks why he needs so much. The guy says that two young nymphomaniacs are spending a week at his place. The doctor fills the prescription.
Later that week, the same guy goes back to the doctor asking for pain killers. The doctor asks "Why? Is your dick in that much pain?" "No", says the guy, "it's for my wrists--the girls never showed up!"
Thursday, March 31, 2011
"Bad (Not Bad Ass) Tattoo" : Symbolism
Blow jobs and doggystyle are likely at the top of most men's list of fav sex acts. Therefore, this tattoo is not so far off in representation for the masses as it is in being logical. The imagery isn't so bad either. Quite clever actually. I'm just convinced that putting sexually active Japanese (can we call it that?) symbols on the back of your calves is a sure sign you're the kind of person not getting to participate in either one of these sex acts. And if you plan on it, be sure not to let anyone you plan on humping get a glimpse of it before it happens. Because it won't.
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
"The Hard Sell" : Taboo In Advertising
This ad by the National Health Service in the UK is not only a print ad, but also had a matching commercial in which the man was actually dragged by the fish hook. Needless to say, it didn't sit so well with the public and the ads drew hundreds of (actually closer to 1000) filed complaints. In the end, the commercial was considered the most disturbing to people. The the print ads were ruled to be avoided in locations where the ads could easily be seen by children and the tv ads similarly couldn't be aired with children's programing.
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
And I Quote...
“I'm a simple man. All I want is enough sleep for two normal men, enough whiskey for three, and enough women for four.” --Joel Rosenberg
Monday, March 28, 2011
"Monday Man Candy": Robin Thicke
Blue-eyed soul never looked so good until Robin Thicke took it over. He by no means is the first to do it, but he is to date the sexiest and most naturally accepted doing it (and by the way, he happens to hate the term "blue-eyed soul" because he thinks it is stereotypical). Even though he has not crossed into the realm of super famous, he has accomplished a lot and is regarded in music. He has won songwriting and production Grammy's for both one of his own albums and other people's albums (Jennifer Hudson and Lil' Wayne to be specific). The downside is that he is taken. But even in that dissapointment is a bit of charm because he married his high school sweetheart, actress Paula Patton. Gotta love that.
Sunday, March 27, 2011
"Sex 101"
This week's OMGFactsSEX stats and facts:
* The Fallopian tubes are named after Gabriel Fallopius, a physician who discovered them in the 1500s.
* Fallopius was also one of the 1st doctors to recommend condom use to protect against STD’s back in 1546.
* 90% of the world’s necrophiliacs are men.
* Part of the reason that wigs were popular in the 18th century was to cover up the hair loss caused by syphilis.AIDS and HIV rates in China are increasing among the elderly.
* One study found the 2 most important factors for marriage compatibility were religion and similarity of drinking habits.
* The World Health Organization estimated there are 100 million sex acts per day leading to 365,000 new cases of venereal disease.
* An estimated 1 out of every 200 women is born with a third nipple.
* Mo Ka Wang could lift 250 pounds of weight off the floor using only his penis.
* Most people contract STDs when they are (supposedly) in monogamous relationships.
* The “venereal” in “venereal disease” is a reference to Venus, the goddess of love and sex.
* The act of watching couples having sex in parked cars is called “dogging”.
* In America, bestiality is a felony in only 15 states.
Saturday, March 26, 2011
Street Walking Nightmare
I missed the memo, but apparently Anti-Street Harassment Day was held the other day. Living in NYC, this is a constant issue and the attention from men is exhausting. I think this form, cited as one of the ways to fight back, is fantastic. My iPod has been my best defense so far, but maybe I should pass these out. I was always curious if it was as rampant as I thought it was, but since there is an actual movement for it, I have my answer.
Friday, March 25, 2011
"Sexpot of the Week" : Christina Perri
Christina Perry has one of those instant stardon stories that you just love to hear. Taught herself to play the guitar at 16. Moved from Philly to LA at 21 and waited tables of course. Then back to Philly when her marriage and plans didn't work out. You know, the starving artist story. And while all this is going on, she writes "Jar of Hearts" . The song gets passed to a choreographer on "So You Think You Can Dance". It gets used. People like it. People buy it. She gets a major record deal. She's a star now. You know, the not a starving artist anymore story. The most amusing part is that she is so rocked out (tattoos galore and a guitar to match), but listening to "Jar of Hearts" (a very strong ballad), you would never guess she's packaged the way she is. There's something special about people who challenge stereotypes. It'll be itneresting to see how she evolves and what she comes out with next. I shall stay tuned.
Thursday, March 24, 2011
"Dirty Joke" : Lottery
Woman rushes into her house one morning and yells to her husband,"Sam, pack up your stuff. I just won the lottery!""Shall I pack for warm weather or cold?""Whatever. Just so you're out of the house by noon!"
"Bad (Not Bad Ass) Tattoo" : Non-Pretty Woman
Let's play a game of guess that celebrity. The tattoos on the man above are supposedly all of a certain movie star. Can you distinguish who it is? If you chose Julia Roberts, you are either really good at inferring blog titles or you are psychic. Psychic because none of these tattoos actually look like Julia Roberts and anyone who would think so by looking at them would have to have some special abilities. Now, this guy does look like he has partaken in a prostitute or two so I'm sure his obsession with her started in her first notable role in "Pretty Woman." Let's just hope for her own sanity that she never finds out about this.
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
"The Hard Sell" : Taboo In Advertising
The Health Ministry of Israel did not find these ads for Kiss: All Natural Tobacco amusing one bit. But the interesting part is that they did not go after the ads for being obscene. They filed a complaint on the grounds that the cigarette packets resemble human beings and therefore violate the law against the use of humans in cigarette ads. And it worked. The tobacco company was fined for the use of humans in the ads. Who knew humans looked like this in Israel?
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
News Spotlight: Chris Brown and a New Shit Fit
Another day, another Chris Brown rage. This guy constantly wants to beat someone's ass. Geez.
From New York Daily News: "Chris Brown may need a few more anger management lessons.
Even though a Los Angeles judge has commended him for turning his life around since pleading guilty to felony assault in 2009, the R&B artist had a massive meltdown at the "Good Morning America" studios in Manhattan on Tuesday.
Brown, 21, became angered during his live interview with co-host Robin Roberts, who asked repeated questions about his domestic violence incident with Rihanna, even though he was there to promote his new album, "F.A.M.E.," which was released on Tuesday.
After the interview, Brown allegedly took his rage out in his dressing room, where he yelled loud enough to warrant a visit from security and broke a window. Shattered glass fell onto 43rd St. and Broadway, reported TMZ.com, which posted a picture of the smashed window.
Brown reportedly then took off his shirt and confronted a "GMA" producer before leaving the building and skipping a planned second performance, which was to air on the "GMA" website.
A short time after his exit, Brown took to his Twitter account to express his displeasure over the interview and thank his fans for their continued support.
"I'm so over people bringing this past sh-t up!!!" he tweeted. "Yet we praise Charlie sheen and other celebs for there [sic] bullsh-t!"
"All my fans!!! This album is for you and only you!!!" he wrote in a second tweet. "I'm so tired of everyone else!! Honestly!! I love team breezy!!""Thank you to everyone who supports my music!!!" he wrote in a third.
"Key Word (music) !!! Love y'all."
A rep for Brown has yet to comment on the matter."
Monday, March 21, 2011
"Monday Man Candy": Boris Kodjoe
Some men get sexier with age and some, like Boris Kodjoe, are fine no matter what age they are. He has been in films for over a decade now and at 38, it doesn't seem the business is having an adverse effect on his sex appeal. He is just as sexy now as he was in his 20s. Unfortunately, he never gets amazing roles and "Undercovers", the show he got his first real starring role in last, tanked and got cancelled. But he does have three other projects on the horizon so he's still getting some screen time. And honestly, looking the way he does, why wouldn't he be?
Saturday, March 19, 2011
Friday, March 18, 2011
"Sexpot of the Week" : Jennifer Lawrence
Jennifer Lawrence is on a hot streak right now. After you get an Oscar nomination that's just what seems to happen, though. At only 20, her role in "Winter's Bone" got her that recognition and she has added 5 new projects to her roster since. She is definitely one to watch. And not just because she's a good actress, but because she is obviously breathtaking. She's pretty new on the scene so there isn't a lot of gossip surrounding her yet (there's relatively little information on her at all), but you know it's coming. Stay tuned.
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