Monday, May 30, 2011

MIA Status

Dear Readers,

Sorry for the break in content. The Metal Taboo computer OD'd and is in rehab. Please excuse me in this difficult time as I lend support to an important member of my team. I will resume content later this week. Thanks for your understanding.


Wednesday, May 25, 2011

"Sex in Art" Weekly Picks

Jose Antonio Gonzalez Carrasco


To see more artwork, go to the "Sex in Art" website.

News Spotlight: Kim as Wifey

So yeah, Kim Kardashian is engaged to her six-month boo Kris Humphries. It's fascinating that after all the black penis she has had in her, she has decided to commit to a half black one. Gotta give her points for switching it up. And while he is a professional basketball player, he can't be that rich so why the hell would he drop $2 million on an engagement ring? Oh, I know. Because now that what's her's is his, he can afford it. It's already being rumored she's going to make millions off this wedding. Here's to getting ready for another Kardashian reality show.

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

And I Quote...Bob Dylan Birthday Edition

Today is Bob Dylan's 70th birthday so below are some of his most notable quotes over the years.

“Being noticed can be a burden. Jesus got himself crucified because he got himself noticed. So I disappear a lot.”

“Chaos is a friend of mine.”

“Money doesn't talk, it swears.”

“To live outside the law, you must be honest.”

“Just because you like my stuff doesn't mean I owe you anything.”

“No one is free, even the birds are chained to the sky.”

“All I can do is be me, whoever that is.”

“People seldom do what they believe in. They do what is convenient, then repent.”

“I'll let you be in my dreams if I can be in yours.”

“A man is a success if he gets up in the morning and gets to bed at night, and in between he does what he wants to do.”

“There is nothing so stable as change.”

“All this talk about equality. The only thing people really have in common is that they are all going to die.”

Monday, May 23, 2011

News Spotlight: Some Monday Catfighting

Everyone likes a catfight. It's especially amusing when it involves unlikely participants like January Jones and Zach Galifianakis. I like January Jones, but mostly because I've already had the preception that she would be a bit of a bitch in real life. I happen to like bitches. And to her defense, this is only his side and maybe he's really just annoying enough to encourage a "go away" request. If she's half the bitch I hope she is, she will sound off and respond to his shit talking.

From E! Online: "We can eliminate Zach Galifianakis from the list of January Jones' potential baby daddies—because he won't even pretend sleep with her.

The Hangover II funnyman is being brutally honest about a run-in he once had with the Mad Men beauty.

Take it away, Zach...

Galifianakis opens up about Jones in an interview with Shortlist. Asked by the interviewer about a complimentary comment Jones made to the site, calling him the most "naturally funny" man she'd ever met (sorry Jason Sudeikis), Galifianakis seemed completely baffled by her sweetness.

"That's really funny because, if I remember correctly, she and I were very rude to each other. It was crazy," he explains. "I was at a party—I'd never met her—and she was like, 'Come sit down.' So I sit at her table and talk for 10 minutes, and she goes, 'I think it's time for you to leave now.' "
And what did he come back with?

"So, I say, 'January, you are an actress in a show and everybody's going to forget about you in a few years, so f--king be nice' and I got up and left. And she thinks that's funny?"

But he wasn't finished yet.

Galifianakis tops it off by adding that if a script demanded he do a sex scene with the actress, he'd wouldn't want any part of it.

"I wouldn't want to. I'd hate it," he said. "I've only had to do a few of those things where you have to kiss and stuff. It's so embarrassing."

Guess that means no maternity gifts from the actor. Now back to who that baby daddy is..."

Thursday, May 19, 2011

"Bad (Not Bad Ass) Tattoo" : A Star is Born

Just thinking about the pain this woman went through when getting this done hurts my soul. Not sure how many sittings it took, but it's probably safe to say she invested hours upon hours of agony. Furthermore, I have two points about this being a cover-up. One, you'd wonder just how fucked up the original tattoo is for someone to resort to this. And second, this is such a cop out for a cover-up tattoo. Cover-ups usually work around the original tattoo to create something new and interesting. Throwing globs of black ink over the tattoo as a solution is hardly imaginative. But it did work I suppose.

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

And I Quote...

“I'll be there for you, as long as it works for me. I play a game. It's called insincerity.” --Trent Reznor

News Spotlight: Staub and Circumstances

Ok so if you're into raunchy reality tv, you're probably aware that the Real Housewives of New Jersey returned last night. And with a bang. The Jersey crew never dissapoints as this return included a dozens involved brawl appropriately placed at a baby's christening. All that aside, the thing I am most amused with is the fact that Daniel Staub, one of the previous stars of the show, is now stripping at Scores after refusing to return. And in amused, I mean saddened. If you wanna shake your tattas for a crowd, it certainly is your right. But Staub is 48 and every once in a while rights have to be revoked.

Saturday, May 14, 2011

"Bad (Not Bad Ass) Tattoo": Blah Blah Blah

This tattoo makes no sense. None at all. If you can decipher what the hell this clusterfuck of words means, you are beyond one sharp cookie. Oh, and the artwork and script suck too. Insult to injury.

Friday, May 13, 2011

"The Hard Sell" : Taboo In Advertising

This New Zealand Autotrader billboard depicting two dogs looking out the window and using a play on the word "bitches" did not amuse some folks. It seems the main offense of the ad is people could not see the dogs in the window and when the words were read, people assumed it was a sexist rant. Autotrader didn't wait for a ruling against them in the matter. They decided to just take the billboard down to appease the bitching public.

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

News Spotlight: Celebrity Baby Name Fuckery

Celebrities are known for cray cray baby names. The newest addition is Alicia Silverstone and Christopher Jarecki's new baby boy. Name: Bear Blu. Status: WTF. I'm all about creativity and uniqueness when it comes to labeling (I actually think the name is kinda adorable), but only when it involves oneself. These babies have no say in the matter and while the parents are off the hook after the name is given, the kid has to spend the rest of his/her life explaining what Mom and Dad were thinking--or drinking. Poor little cub.

Monday, May 9, 2011

"Monday Man Candy": Chris Hemsworth

When I saw the previews for Thor in the movie theater, right away I thought Chris Hemsworth was delicious. Then I saw more and more billboards and ads for Thor and decided not only was he delicious, but yummy enough to become an actual fav of mine. And so he is. Every bulging muscle of him. He's only 27 (which is much younger than I usually like 'em) and his first movie role was only two years ago, but he has potential to be a years long obsession. Thor opened this weekend with $66 million so he is likely to get plenty of roles for a while. The more movie screen time, the more eye sugar.

Thursday, May 5, 2011

"Bad (Not Bad Ass) Tattoo" : Not So Sexy

There is no evidence that the owner of these feet and tattoo is not a gorgeous, sexy vixen who turns heads wherever she goes. She just may be a fox. Feet are interesting like that. A really ugly person can have pretty feet and a really attractive person can have some dogs. These aren't the worst of feet, but they aren't exactly pretty (definitely not "sexy") and putting descriptions like that on a foot at all is a bold move. But enough about my rant about feet (is a fetish brewing?). This about the tattoo. And the fact that it is ridiculous and ugly. And that most people who get permanent markings about how sexy they are do not live up to expectations. That fact alone indicates this one is probably not a sexpot.

Happy Cinco de Mayo!

A.K.A. Another reason to get shitfaced.

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

And I Quote...

“Men are like a fine wine. They all start out like grapes, and it's our job to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they mature into something you'd like to have dinner with.” --Kathleen Mifsud

Monday, May 2, 2011

News Spotlight: Death Celebration

In case you live under a rock (or possibly in an Afghan cave), you are aware that the American population is in a state of euphoria over the death of Osama Bin Laden. I don't want to make a big political statement or start a debate, but I will say nothing is more fitting on a blog about "taboo" than pointing out the fascination human beings have with conflict and death.